Self-Support

1.  All types of thoughts pop into our minds during the day. Look at the thoughts you repeat in your mind, what you keep thinking about. If they are negative or scary ("What if so and so happens?"), you could be creating fear or depression for yourself.  It can be supportive if you focus on what you want to happen, not on what you don’t want to happen.  E.g. "I’m looking forward to talking with my friend tonight.  I'm building inner peace for myself.  Next week I'm going hiking."

2.  Fear sometimes comes from telling ourselves we know what is going to happen even though we don't really know - catastrophizing about the future.  It might work better just to tell ourselves we don't have enough information right now to know what will be happening the next day, next week, next month.  We can do the best we can with what is actually going on right now. We can be positive, or at least stay neutral, about the future, and wait and see what actually does happen.  Then we can respond to what actually does happen.  There's a difference between planning ahead (gathering information for informed action) and emotionalizing ahead (worrying about the unknown).  We can prevent negative thoughts and feelings from running us.

3.  Say encouraging, reassuring statements to yourself: “I can do this. I can find a way through this. If I need help, I am willing to ask for it. I know many people are willing to help others. I'll locate them.  We’re all doing this together.  There are many people skilled in working through these things."  Make a commitment to yourself to support yourself through difficulties, instead of criticizing yourself through difficulties.   Remind yourself of your strengths.  Stay in the present.  What can you handle, or enjoy, that is in front of you right now?  Keep it simple.

4.  Fun, humor, laughter, joy, movement, gratitude and positive affirmations can lift our attitude and support the immune system, per research.  Humor - watch funny movies, search for funny/pet YouTube videos, find good jokes on the Internet and share some with your friends, enjoy the many silly moments that can happen during the day.  Sound and movement help to ease the ’down’ feelings.  Use your voice: talk with someone, sing, hum, whistle, tone.  Activity:  dance, walk, march in place to music, do yoga, jump rope, etc.

5.  Connect with people - visit or talk with positive loved ones or friends, by phone (video if available),  email, Zoom, Facebook, etc.  Enjoy online scrabble, chess, etc, with friends or play a game with players registered online.  Organize a nature walk.  Pets can be great company too!

6.  Develop daily nourishing practices to keep positive energy moving for you.  For example, think of one positive statement about yourself or others or something significant, and say it out loud several times a day.  Read out loud some nurturing, supportive passages in books, online - in affirmation books, Bible, etc.  Take a walk and sing or hum.  Meditation, walks, pray, sing, dance, deep breathing, care for and play with pets, exercise, sleep, journal writing, read poetry (available online also),  tend to plants and gardens, play. YouTube has things like ocean wave sounds and nature sounds you can have playing in the background for long periods of time - put your feet up with a cup of tea, or at bedtime.  Nurturing, relaxing. 

7.  Minimize the time listening to news, only what is really necessary. Listening for extended time is like immersing yourself in drama and trauma, and can have a scary or depressing effect on you.

8.  Look for more beauty.  It can help handling things that are not so beautiful.  Examples: your garden, pets, music, pictures, people helping people, a brightly-colored throw pillow or afghan, flowers and trees, etc.  Search online for things like 'beautiful gardens' or 'famous paintings', etc. 

9.  Express loving.  For example, self-appreciations: "I like how I finished that project. I like the flowers I put on the table. I appreciate my persistence in resolving that problem. I see that I am a generous person."  For others: expressing gratitude to a friend for being thoughtful, petting your dog, helping someone buy groceries, planting new flowers in your loved garden.

10.  Journal writing - you can use it like a good friend, and tell it your experiences for the day, your joys and concerns, and your thoughts and feelings about things, so you can express them and not keep thinking about them so much.  You can also note and expand on any new discoveries, learnings and insights.

11.  From a spiritual perspective, you can ask God for clarity, guidance and assistance with all levels - physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, etc.  I recommend asking for whatever is for the highest good for all concerned in the situation.  Be open for assistance that can come in ways different from what you might expect.   Be aware of what you see and hear, in what is going on in your environment.  E.g. A chance comment overheard in a store might provide valuable insight for an issue.  (See "How to Not Recognize Spiritual Help" on Spirituality Page.)  What might come forward could be something you may need rather than what you may want.

Know that inner peace is possible even if outer circumstances are a challenge.

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Disclaimer:  The information provided on this website is for general informational and educational purposes only and should not be seen as medical, health, nutritional, psychological or any type of advice.  Individual circumstances vary greatly and please consult with a professional directly about your individual situation before making any changes or taking any kind of action.